Parts of the Whole of my Life

So far my blog has been boring at best with somewhat amusing little notes written by me when I was feeling inspired. Now it is time to bring the blog home and introduce different parts of my life. So where do I start? I guess a good place to start would be by introducing myself so here we go.....

I am a 29 year old (technically) single mother of one daughter, Piper (age 6). Now with that said I am not single, Tad and I have been together for two and a half years, and Piper is not my only child as via Tad I have the wonderful privilege of being stepmomma to Blake (age 14), Sannie (age 10) and Tristan (age 5). I have a wonderful family who are immensely supportive of me and my dreams as I endeavour to be for them! Lets see what else, in December 2009 after eight years of uphill fights I graduated from Boise State University with my Bachelors of Science in Criminal Justice Administration of Courts and Law.

So now for the part that anyone who already knows me knows....Piper has a rare disease that impacts the most basic of functions of her daily life, she has Eosinophilic Esophagitis or EE (EOS). Our life long fight against this disease she lives with daily has changed me, helped to mold who she is and is impacting the life of all those close to her (such as her siblings). Piper's daily struggles and the rarity of the disease led me to establish a support group where indivduals or families could come and learn about the disease, could get support, could give support and could make friends of others facing similar situations. I run the Eosinophlic Disorders Information and Support Network on facebook due to the simple fact that I have neither the computer knowledge nor monetary capital to build the website that the support group so honestly deserves!

I can guarantee you that in the future you will see many of posts about Piper's disease, and probably quite a few more posts about it than the other children and what is going on with them just due to the fact that Piper's disease can ravage our entire family and my emotional fortitude so easily. Piper is a bright and brilliant child who loves life and will tell you that she wants to be a animal doctor when she grows up and then casually toss in that her body doesn't like her, and she is right....it doesn't.

As I sit here writing this I occasionally hear Piper cry out from her room but she isn't awake, tonite it is a cry of discomfort. Piper's constant companion is discomfort or pain and it breaks my heart to listen to my baby cry while sleeping and know that even then she doesn't get to escape the ravages of a disease to which there is no solid treatment, there is no cure, there is no understanding of how one gets it, how it works, how to cure it or how to treat it. The only understanding we have is that she hurts constantly, that food is her enemy and that her life is anything but simple child's play.............

50 Facts...

1. I am a strong woman

2. I am a mother

3. I am a best friend

4. I am an individual

5. I am not defined by titles

6. I have a mind of my own

7. I love my life most days

8. I enjoy the people I choose to surround myself with

9. I know life is not always easy

10. I love my children

11. I want to do something important with my life

12. I will do everything I can to achieve my dreams with purpose and integrity

13. I value the thoughts and opinions of others even if I don’t agree with them

14. I am in charge of my destiny

15. I believe that true friends are as valuable as family

16. I have two true friends, Tad and my mother

17. I love music

18. I love summer

19. I love reading

20. I enjoy long walks on warm nites

21. I hate winter

22. I have learned from my mistakes

23. I know others cannot learn from my mistakes, they need to make their own in order to learn from them

24. No two people are alike

25. I love to laugh

26. I think crying once in awhile is healthy

27. I have a nasty temper and at times have to fight to control it

28. I believe each one of my children are unique special individuals with great possibilities in front of them

29. I believe we all have the potential for acts of kindness

30. I believe that if you give kindness it will return to you in your time of need

31. I believe to many people take for granted what they have

32. I know that most people do not realize just how lucky they are or just how much they really have

33. I don’t like drama

34. I don’t like fighting

35. I like to have fun

36. I believe there is no harm in going out once in awhile but that my place is at home with my family

37. I would die to protect those I love

38. I trust implicitly until given a reason not to

39. Once my trust is lost it is gone for ever

40. I forgive but I never forget

41. If you can’t be honest with yourself don’t expect others to be honest with you

42. Love isn’t always a two way street, at times you will love more and stronger than those you love but that doesn’t mean their love isn’t just as valuable as yours

43. I do not believe that people give others enough credit and judge people to harshly and before they know them

44. Appearances are often wrong

45. I am not a doormat and I will stand up for myself

46. I have grown as a person and continue to grow

47. I am learning everyday what is really important in life and it isn’t the fighting, one-up-manship, never ending drive for more

48. Material possessions will never make you complete

49. People matter way more than things

50. I value what I have because I know it may be gone tomarrow

In the last year I have learned a lot about myself and what I am capable of. I believe that there is nothing I can’t do if I put my mind to it and I know what is important in life. Life should never be a quest to see just how much you can obtain, how much money you can make or how many important people you can meet. Life is about loving what you have and knowing that you need to love yourself and your family!

Things I Do and Do Not Know

1. I do know you should always follow your heart

2. I do know my children come first

3. I do know that I am smart and worth loving or caring about

4. I do know that occasionally you just need to step back and let someone have a bad day

5. I do know that if you care enough to wait then it was worth it

6. I do know that listening is important in any relationship

7. I do know that sometimes you just need to be supportive and bite your damn tongue

8. I do know that things don’t always work out the way they should

9. I do know that sometimes things hurt when they shouldn’t

10. I do know that people are not always rational, especially when their feelings are involved.

11. I do know that love and understanding are important

12. I do know that you should trust until given a reason not to

13. I don’t know why people use others as emotional battering rams

14. I don’t know why everything in life has to be a challenge, but I do know that the challenge can be rewarding

15. I do know you should never look back and say I should have…

16. I do know that being held by the right person can make you feel peaceful even when your world is anything but.

17. I do know that a simple smile, kiss, kind word or look can turn your day around

18. I do know that it is important to be honest with yourself and with others

19. I do know that sometimes you have to accept that others know something you don’t and you need to just shut up and listen to them

20. I do know that your heart and brain don’t always say the same thing and it isn’t always easy to know which one is right

21. I do know that occasionally you need to just cry

22. I do know that laughter is a great way to improve your day

23. I do know that I am a good person, even when I might not be acting like one

24. I do know that you need to take chances in life or your not living life

25. I do know you need to learn from past experiences but not let them rule today

26. I do know that I am different and that I am not to be pigeon holed just because I have had similar experiences as someone else

27. I do know that when I love I love unconditionally and with all my heart, which usually gets me hurt.

28. I do know that I want to be happy

29. I don’t know where I will be in 20 years or hell 2 years for that matter

30. I do know I care deeply about those around me and would do anything to protect them

31. I do know I am strong enough to over come adversity

32. I don’t know why some people feel the need to beat others

33. I don’t know why some people can’t communicate

34. I don’t know why sometimes I feel so scared inside

35. I don’t know why people who love each other can’t be honest with each other

36. I do know I would rather know the truth than be protected from it

37. I do know that smart is more than something you get from a textbook

38. I do know that blood is thicker than water but that sometimes water is better for you

39. I don’t know what the future hold, but I have hope for it

40. I don’t know if I am a good mom

41. I do know I try my damndest to be a good mom

42. I don’t know if I am a good partner in life matters

43. I do know I try to be a good partner by listening, communicating, giving space, giving love and understanding, being supportive and sometimes by just being a presence in the room when one is needed

The number one thing I do know is that no matter how hard you try sometimes your going to get knocked back on your ass. The important thing is that you pick yourself up, dust yourself off and remember that you are loved and that you have an amazing capacity to love and overcome obstacles in life.

Meandering Thoughts and Inspirational Quotes

Okay so today I am feeling slightly under the weather, a little lonely and somewhat inspired. So with that being said I decided to post some of my past meandering thoughts and some collected words of wisdom that always seem to brighten my day. I hope that those who read this blog/bulletin enjoy the total package as much as I do…by the way sorry if some of it is a little sappy…my mood is running a little far and wide today.

“Opinions are like ex’s everyone has them so why stress them”…SKS

“We have only this moment. Sparking like a star in our hand…and melting like a snowflake. Let us use it before it is too late.” Marie Beyon Ray

“The Sweetest Joy the Wildest Woe is Love” Pearl Bailey

“It is so much easier to be enthusiastic than to reason” Eleanor Roosevelt

“Life is ours to be spent not to be saved.” D.H Lawrence

“I can do no great things. Only small things with great love.” Mother Teresa

“Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much” Helen Keller

“We turn not older with years but newer every day” Emily Dickinson

“You can’t shake hands with a clenched fist” Indira Ghandi

“Things do not change, we do” Henry David Thoreau

“Light Tomarrow with today”Elizabeth Barrett Browning

“Life is what we make it. Always has been. Always will be” Grandma Moses

“Far Away there in the sunshine are my highest aspirations. I may not reach them. But I can loop up and see their beauty. Believe in them. And try to follow where they lead.” Mary McCloud Bethune

“The Best and Most Beautiful things in the world cannot be seen. Nor Touched…But are felt in the Heart” Helen Keller

“Life is an ever changing adventure. Some of the roads you may travel down won’t always be pleasant but more often than not what you find at the end of the road was well worth the journey. It is my belief that you can never regret what you do willingly and that you should never wish you could go back in time and undo things you have done. Everything happens for a reason, every event we partake of leads us to the next bend in the road and to the next new and great prospect. If we choose to spend our lives looking back we will never understand, accept or enjoy the beauty of what is happening or what lies ahead. Caution is well and good but occasionally you need to take a chance or miss out on living life and finding love. Always look at the ramifications of your actions, realize that your actions create a ripple far and wide and that it isn’t just your pond that feels the waves you create. Love like it is your last chance to love, give your whole self and be yourself. The only person you hurt by presenting a false front is yourself because in the end you may loose your love because of the deception. Be honest with yourself and others about your wants, fears, dreams and aspirations so that you may lean upon those who love and care about you to over come adversity and reach your goals.” SKS 2008

Me and My View of Me

Life will bring you something new everyday...it won't tell you what to do with it or how to handle it...that is up to you and shows who you are more than anything!


I am a daughter, sister, mother, lover, friend and independent soul. I enjoy a great many things such as laughter, easy conversation, long walks on a warm night, playing with my children, reading a good book, listening to music just a tad to loud and sitting quietly and just being from time to time. I do not consider myself a people person; I do consider myself a fair and decent person. I believe in honesty, truth and justice. I am not a believer in a fair world as I am not delusional. I do not believe that you should regret things you have done willingly, no matter how they may have turned out in the end. I do not believe in sugar coating the truth, honesty is best delivered without the sugar but with a well measured dose of decorum. I am loyal to a fault and trust until given a reason not to. I am neither blind nor deaf so your insults and complaints do reach me; however, I am at my leisure to do with them what I will. I try to live my life the best I can, make informed decisions, think before I act or speak and to not instantly think the worse of people or a given situation. I am not perfect and do not strive for perfection. I prefer to spend my time surrounded by family and friends. I do not like crowds, bickering, arguing and one up-man ship. I do not like people who proclaim to be your friend but are only available when it is convenient for them and who are not honest with you to your face but feel it free and necessary to voice their opinion and complaints about you to everyone else. I believe in doing my best and in owning my mistakes. I believe in loving with all my heart and that the person you love should be your best friend, your greatest confidant and the person that you think of the most. I believe that from time to time you need to spend time with yourself thinking about your dreams, hopes, wishes and desires. I do not believe one should easily give up on hopes and dreams. I believe that there is too much intentional malice and cruelty in this world. I don’t believe that people generally show who they really are to others and that at times even to themselves. I don’t believe any of us really know what we are capable of until we are faced with a given situation and that too often we act rashly and later wish we could undo our decisions. Life is not a game but too many people treat it as if it is one with their constant need to compete against others. I want to spend my life watching my children grow, loving my best friend, laughing with my family, experiencing new adventures, watching my dreams become reality and knowing that I have done everything that I can to have the best life I can make for myself, because I am truly in charge of my future and my happiness!